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Geno Sez… |
September 2005 |
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Geno Sez… |
September 2005 |
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We know you’re out at night living the good life that comes with being a Bud Light drinker, but we also know that September means term papers and, as always, the BL offices have thought ahead. Just clip and save the following term papers below for the next time you roll in an hour before one is due. Then—through the miracle of Microsoft Word—hand in your eight-page triple-spaced paper in a size fifteen font. That leaves you the rest of the day to search the internet for an online diploma! -xoxo ~g |
EngineeringSure the works of Einstein and Oppenheimer are notable, but Bud Light has finally taken things to the next level. The new 16oz.Bud Light Aluminum bottle features all the convenience of a can allowing it to be enjoyed in places glass isn’t welcome—like the beach or my niece’s daycare—with all the cooling technology of a can. In lab test the only things that stayed colder to a man’s touch longer was either wearing a toe tag or Lillith Fair T-shirt. |
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Marine BiologyWhile
the lovely beaches of Delaware teem with marine life, my studies focused
on habits its land dwelling creatures. After an “extensive”
three-month study, my findings showed that while both Dewey and Rehoboth
inhabitants love Bud Light—the Dewey Beach alpha male’s blowhole is
twice as large at last call while the Rehoboth’s is a far more refined
creature often spotted with Seamen. |
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LiteratureI
was so busy this summer with the Bud Light Maxim Part and Best Bartender
Competition that I didn’t have time to enjoy the classics of
Hemingway, Twain, or Bloom. I did, however, make a contribution to
literature akin to these greats—I spent an hour in Starbuck’s
slapping the new Harry Potter book out of people’s hands screaming
“You’re a GROWN man!” Somewhere Papa is smiling... |
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